I REMEMBER THE WAY THE BREAKFAST SMELLED IN THE MORNING. ARE TALKS THAT WE USED TO HAVE OR EVEN YOUR LAUGHS. I MISS THE SMELL YOU HAD. IT WAS A SMELL OF HEAVEN AND LOVE. WHEN I LOST YOU A BIG PART OF ME DIED INSIDE AS WELL. IT HAS BEEN VERY HARD FOR ME TO THINK OF YOU CAUSE EVERY TIME I DO CRY. I KNOW THAT YOU WOULD WANT ME TO BE STRONG AND KNOW THAT YOU ARE WATCHING OVER ME. U MISSED ME HAVING A BEAUTIFUL DAUGHTER THAT I KNOW U WOULD HAVE LOVED AND SHE WOULD HAVE LOVED YOU. I HATE MYSELF FOR NOT BEING ABLE TO TELL YOU GOOD BYE. TO KISS YOU OR TOUCH YOU ONE LAST TIME BEFORE U WERE GONE. U WERE ALWAYS PROUD OF ME NO MATTER WHAT LIFE THROUGH AT ME. U GAVE ME HOPE TO BE A BETTER PERSON. I MISS SITTING BY YOU AND IN CHURCH AND LEANING OVER TO ME SAYING " WHAT DID HE SAY I CAN'T HEAR HIM. AND LAUGH." WHEN I GO TO CHURCH NOW I CRY FOR YOU. EVERYTHING REMINDS ME OF YOU. I MISS BEING AT YOUR HOUSE AND HAVING HOLIDAYS THERE OF JUST STOPPING BY TO TELL YOU I LOVE YOU. I REMEMBER THE AY U WOULD STAND OUT SIDE AND WAVE TO ME UNTIL I WAS GONE OUT OF SITE. I STILL GO BY THERE WISHING THAT YOU WERE OUT SIDE. BUT ALL I SEE IS OTHER PEOPLE LIVING THERE AND IT KILLS ME NOT TO SEE YOU AND TO KNOW THAT AS A LITTLE GIRL I GREW UP THERE. I DON'T TELL ALOT OF PEOPLE MY FEELINGS. I MOSTLY KEEP THEM INSIDE AND HIDE THEM. BUT THE TRUTH IS I MISS YOU MORE THAN ANYTHING. I WISH I COULD JUST SMELL YOU AND TOUCH YOU ONE MORE TIME. I WOULD CALL YOUR ANSWERE MACHINE OVER AND OVER JUST TO HEAR YOUR VOICE. I HAVE ALOT OF PAIN INSIDE AND YOU KNOW IT BUT ALOT OF PEOPLE DON'T. ONE DAY I WILL MEET YOU AGAIN AND SEE YOU. THAT SMELL WILL COME BACK AND I CAN'T WAIT TO SEE YOUR FACE AGAIN. I LOVE YOU SO MUCH THAT I FEEL GUILTY CAUSE I WASNT HERE TO BE BESIDE YOU. BUT I KNOW THAT YOU ARE WATCHING OVER ME AND YOUR GREAT GRANDAUGHTER EVERYDAY. YOU ARE AND ALWAYS WILL BE MY ANGEL... I LOVE YOU GRANDMA.
YOUR JENNY POO-POO
You know when people tell you it gets easier over time, they dont mean it they just dont know what to tell you. You were there for me and understood me when many didnt. You opened your heart and spoke your mind. You knew when people were lying to you but loved them enough to not let them know. You are one of the greatest women that I knew and everyday is harder than the day before. Its another day I dont have you. People are scared to talk about you because it brings back memories of you not there. When I got visit Grandpa its so hard for me, he sees something in me like a familiarity that he doesnt see in others that allows him to open up and talk about you to me. I miss you so much and think about you every single day. I wasnt ready fo ryou to go...you werent ready to go... I had a wedding with out you and it was the hardest thing I ever had to do...to have no grandparents at my wedding. I know you were there in spirit ...I could feel you. I chose to get married at St.Michaels for you and I never told anyone that....it was for you. I LOVE YOU AND WILL SEE YOU IN HEAVEN and in my Dreams.
Just wanted you to know that I`m doing my best to take care of dad till he comes to be with you . He`s doing well, although the lonliess still eats at his heart. but his health is good and I keep him in peanut butter. I remember you telling me... that your biggest concern if you died before him... was what would happen to him. Sometimes the kids go to see him although not often, but I think they get really sad, so they don`t go as often as they should. They should try walking in my shoes. I order his medicine and keep his phone,cable, and rent payed. His clothes clean, insurance payed,income taxes. And go see him at least once a week to give him some love, take him for a haircut or ice cream. Maybe to lunch or dinner. He`s 88 now you know... we sure miss you mom........ we sure miss you......... I sure miss you.....